Translate, Edit, Proof
The Process of Changing a Thesis
from Japanese to English
In Write, Edit, Proof, we discussed the three separate types of work that go into writing a thesis: writing, editing, and proofreading. In this essay, we will look at the textbook approach and compare the textbook approach with the situation that occurs when a native Japanese speaking translator translates a thesis from Japanese to English and sends it to us for 英文校正 in Japanese. Although some theses are translated by native English speakers, this is the standard approach.
Both approaches work fine with educated, skilled writers, editors, and proofreaders. Please note that we say native English speakers here for the sake of brevity. When we write native English speakers, we actually mean educated native English speakers who are experienced writing professionals. Being a native English speaker or a fluent bilingual is only the first requirement. After the first requirement, comes a series of other requirements concerning education and professional experiences. We are not quite sure how to translate 英文校正 into English. Our dictionaries say proofreading, but our experience tells us that the work we do is a combination of editing and proofreading.
Although we have never seen a clear academic textbook description that explains the writing process from translation to proofreading, we view the process as having three stages: translation, editing, and proofreading. For the sake of this
essay, we will imagine the translation, editing, and proofreading of a thesis. Let's return to our imaginary thesis on English education in Japan, The Future of English Education in Japan. Before we start with the three steps for the translation to proofreading of this thesis, let's look at the Japanese writing process.
The Japanese writing process is not the same as the English writing process. As we discuss elsewhere on the Aaron site, native English speakers writing for an English speaking audience and native Japanese speakers writing for a Japanese speaking audience have different expectations and beliefs as do their audiences. Such differences accompany the dissimilar
cultural environments. Native English speaking writers are expected to write for their audience so the audience can understand. This is why native English speaking writers normally follow the process of write, edit, and proofread. Native English speaking writers who do not write so their audience can understand are considered to be poor writers. The responsibility for reading comprehension rests with the writer.
In contrast, this is not so among Japanese writers. The native speaking Japanese reader is expected to understand the intended meaning of the writing. There is limited responsibility for the writer to communicate with the audience so the audience is able to understand. There is actually a common school of thought that dense and difficult to understand writing is successful writing. People who do such writing are often considered 偉い, which could be translated as distinguished or important. Japanese writers who follow the write, edit, and proofread process in Japanese will produce a thesis that is easier and faster to translate, edit, and proofread into a better English thesis. Japanese writers who follow the 偉い approach in Japanese will produce a thesis that will be more difficult and time consuming to translate, edit, and proofread into a good English thesis.
Thus, native Japanese speakers writing essays in Japanese to translate into English would do themselves a service to follow the write, edit, and proof model. Doing so will enable them to have a better English thesis at the end of the process.
The translate, edit, and proofread process for The Future of English Education in Japan is as follows:
1. The Japanese translator translates The Future of English Education in Japan.
2. The native English speaker edits The Future of English Education in Japan.
3. The native English speaker proofreads The Future of English Education in Japan.
This essay will explain these three essential stages and the consultation and interaction that takes place between the Japanese translator and the native English speaking editor. Conscious knowledge and understanding of this process will help you in writing your project, thesis, and/or dissertation.
Translating
Stage 1: In this stage the native Japanese speaking translator translates the thesis into English. This stage is divided into recurring sections where ideally, the translator reads the thesis, does any research necessary, translates, and consults with native English speakers and other translators as necessary.
Stage 2: Next, the native English speaker ideally does the thesis editing and proofreading. The word ideally is used here, as not every translator is able to consult with native English speakers and other translators when necessary. Not every translator has the luxury of educated, skilled native speaker resources and the team approach.
Ideally, not only is the thesis translated, but a second Japanese speaking translator then checks the translation to make sure it accurately translates the meaning of the original Japanese. This second translator consults with the original translator and native English speaker as necessary. Such consultations are always the best approach to translations.
In our English textbook on thesis writing, the writer sits down and writes a first draft of The Future of English Education in Japan. In reality though, the writer may write a little, edit a little, and proofread a little. Primarily, the writer creates a first draft as it is not logical to devote too much time to editing and proofreading here.
Native English speaking editing
Write, Edit, Proof explained that this editing stage, rewriting, is the heart of good writing. At the risk of repeating ourselves, if we were to reduce rewriting to three words, they would be: clarity, strength, and brevity. If we look at The Future of English Education in Japan, we ask if it meets these three goals.
Here are the questions we need to ask to judge the quality of the thesis:
1. Does the writing speak clearly to the reader?
2. Does the author present the ideas clearly?
3. Will the writing have an effect on the reader?
4. Does each section of the thesis present one idea?
5. Does each idea move to the next idea in a logical way?
6. Are the grammar, word choices, and tenses of each sentence and each paragraph appropriate and correct?
7. Is the syntax of each sentence accurate and logical?
8. Does the thesis have an introduction, a body of ideas, and a conclusion?
9. Are bibliographical sources correctly cited?
If The Future of English Education in Japan were written according to the native English speaking model of Write, Edit, Proof, this editing stage will be relatively clear and easy. If the thesis were written according to the 偉い model, the editor will need to imagine what the writer wanted to say, and try to edit accordingly. If the editor was confused, it is likely that the translator was also confused. This is not due to poor translators and editors, but due to the Japanese cultural approach in the 偉い writing model. Even if translators and editors try their best, the results will not provide the best possible thesis. The style and information in the 偉い writing model just do not provide enough information for what is viewed as a good thesis in the English speaking world. This is why we recommend that all writers of Japanese theses write or edit their theses according to Write, Edit, Proof. Doing so will enable them to get the best possible English translations of their theses.
Proofreading
Lastly is the proofreading stage, which is carried out as explained in Write, Edit, Proof. If The Future of English Education in Japan were written according to the Write, Edit, Proof model, it will have smoothly progressed to the editing stage, and be just about ready by the time it gets to this stage. This smoothness will then enable
the native English speaking proofreader to do a better proofreading job.
If you look at the description of our different levels of editing and proofreading, you will see that they vary from our basic level to our literary level. The greater the budget, the more time we spend on it and the more people work on it. The better product we we are able to deliver.
As we stated in Write, Edit, Proof, it is not difficult for us to proofread and eliminate errors. National Geographic, the well-known magazine, is very serious about publishing error free articles. After each article is written and edited, four different proofreaders then proofread the article, each one proofreading four times. This totals proofreading each magazine article 16 times. While it is possible that National Geographic can miss an error, we doubt that they have missed many over their many years of publication. We admire their serious attitude and dedicated
approach.
A final copy of The Future of English Education in Japan
Now, the translation of The Future of English Education in Japan is finished. Your thesis has been translated, edited, proofread, and published. You have successfully communicated your message about the future of English education in Japan to the world. Some of your suggestions have been examined as far away as London, New York, and Sydney. The Future of English Education in Japan was accepted as your thesis for your Master of Arts. You have completed your degree.
Now you are hard at work on your next thesis, and we will be here to help you if you would like us to do so.
英語論文翻訳 ( 英日、日英 )、英語論文校正 （ 英文校正 ）、各種言語の論文翻訳、校正、ネイティブチェックサービスについてのお問い合わせは、日本国内代表者連絡先 honyaku@excom-system.com までご連絡ください。
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学術論文翻訳以外にも、ビジネス全般、技術全般、人文社会分野、ウェブサイト翻訳、映像翻訳 （ 字幕 ） などの各種分野について、 和英 英和翻訳、英文
校正 添削 リライト ネイティブチェック、多言語翻訳 校正などの各種翻訳 校正 サービスを提供。英文ライティング （ 自由英作文、英文リーディング&リポートライティング、TOEFL試験
ライティング 対策講座、大学入試 英作文対策講座 など） のネットスクール形式の通信講座も開講。
Editor requests for change
After submitting an article to a journal there are normally three types of replies that we can expect to receive. The first and most common of these is the rejection. Writers who have few of these are either incredible writers and scholars or are playing it safe, only sending articles to places where they know they will be accepted. Far fewer and cause for rejoicing is editor requests for changes. These requests mean the editor likes your work and wants to publish it. Upon seeing some of these requests, that may be difficult to believe. Japanese academicians who receive this type of response often have requests for change for both content and English language work. We have seen a number of requests that have listed so many points we found it hard to believe that the editor was interested too. Even if the editor asks where your literature search is, why the essay is repetitive, how the second section needs to be deleted, how the fourth section needs to be rewritten, and why the entire essay needs to be edited for better English, do not despair. Rejoice for the editor wants to publish your work! The third type of reply is a very infrequent one: an acceptance without a requests for changes. If you receive one of these, you have every right to wax ecstatic. Good luck!
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